Indian parents and mental health reddit. i hate it but its fine .

Indian parents and mental health reddit You basically need to pull back control from your parents, and here’s how you do it. Or check it out in the app stores   The mental health subreddit is the central forum to discuss, vent, support and share information about mental health, illness and wellness. Indian parents have a tough time believing that mental health issues are real. it might be chicken and egg, but because maybe they view having any sort of mental health issues as "going crazy/mad" and their mental image of a "mad" person usually is one of complete delirium, danger to themselves or others, talking to the air kind of person. I am ignored and still ignored by my family. I believe when you are in a better position mentally, then maybe it is possible to speak to them in a language they do understand, but I find a lot of parents in our generation are simply conditioned not to view a mental health concern as an actual disease, something like tuberculosis or whooping cough, that has physical symptoms would have Being stuck in the house 24/7 will only get her physical and mental health worse. Financial issues, blame parents. My parents have so much controlling nature. Anybody with similar experiences when your Indian parents visit and how do you deal with it? This comment is full of platitudes. Then you throw mental illness into this mix - and treatment for it is often not available due to it being heavily stigmatized or no mental health professionals nearby - and you have a horrible situation. Mental health, depression, and anxiety are nothing new among us. BUT INDIAN PARENTS DO THAT BEYOND 18. One of my close relatives is very obviously suffering from multiple mental health conditions (mainly due to a physically disabling chronic Disgusting. Vandrevala Foundation for Mental Health: 1860-2662-345 and 1800-2333-330 (24 hours) iCall: 9152987821 (Available from Monday to Saturday: 8:00am to 10:00pm) Connecting NGO: 18002094353 (Available from 12 pm - 8 pm) The Mental Health Thread is posted every Wednesday morning. It's also a generational thing - mental illness wasn't understood as well in our parents' generations, and back then people just suffered and had to hide it, which probably makes them think they're stronger for doing so. They never said to play video games freely. I’m currently in standard 12 who’s going to give her board exams this February. Alternatively you can find the sharma Ji ka beta type cousin and ask them to help convince your parents about the importance of mental health, they can give example of some fake made up topper classmate who got therapy ( if they don't want to give their own example in case their own parents turn on them and try to do dmg control about their kid ) I explain them about mental health every time like how it works? There are different type of mental disorders? Even I told them that I might get therapy and they were like why do you need it, you had a very comfortable life. Career woes, blame parents. What gets me is the ungratefulness . Coming out to your parents, mental health edition. There is less than 1% of Indian kids in American foster care saying crap like hitting is part of the culture makes us look backward and like abusers. People say my parents won't let me, or i don't have money and blah blah. Parents must have hobbies Dont over indulge and share details. Some couples have found a middle ground of sorts. I thought I could trust my parents, I couldn't. You either explode or shut down if you keep everything inside, let it out. when my cousin got pregnant he sent her to her parents house saying he cannot afford the medical costs of a pregnant woman. Because they dont understand the role of a parent. Don’t worry about it. recently I've been having a lot of intrusive thoughts, and have harmed myself a few times. Because most indian parents don't believe in healthy open and honest communications. And she was beaten, for a silly reason- mind you. Obviously not everyone's parents are like this, some are amazingly open and understanding while others are worse than what you are experiencing. Or check it out in the app stores   Indian Parents and Their Anxiety . Research suggests that mental health issues are absolutely increasing in all countries since the pandemic. I did and it was the best decision I made in my late teens. I’m born in Australia yet she still tries to control everything, every person in my life. You just don't have the time to get into trouble or all this other stuff. I feel that the general consensus with fellow Asians my age and with our parents is that they are just dismissive about mental health. They dont realise there's MANY types of mental health issues and majority are For Indian parents, depression, anxiety etc. I’m an Asian-Indian woman and mental health is not talked about openly in my culture. i hate it but its fine . Reply reply Hope you're in a healthy safe space now. Instead of accepting that their children could be suffering from a mental disorder, they often put everything down to We have 3 children, all with some kind of mental health issue (one more severe than the other). nearly all of my mental health issues are from my parents She is one of the reasons why all her children have mental health issues. Parents who know their child has calibre will guide them to pick what the child good at. The argument you’re using here is called whataboutism. I want to write a blog on this, but I am missing real-world data points to help me get a direction on the subject. With time, I have realised there's a very deep problem that's not on the centre stage, forget that, not even a topic of discussion anywhere. Indian parents are against inter caste/ religion marriages due to thousands of years of tradition and culture and not having an open mind. Reply My mother and step dad are very understanding, but I get a lot a crap from my dad. Firstly, people across all walks of life in all countries have felt the brunt of the pandemic. My 2 cents: Indian parents will often (a) make huge, guilt-tripping threats they’ll never follow through on, and (b) blame you for it. Parents are supposed to teach their children about the world, prepare them for life so they can stand strong no matter what life throws at them, make their own decisions, know how to handle themselves, know how to read people, know what kind of people they should associate with. there is already lots of misinformation going on therefore it may cause judgement to impaired. Objective by definition what is a parent. This is a space for Women/nb . Well I am not alone anymore, Reddit is with us Seriously Indian parents do not sleep together once they have kids. This is typical Indian parents behaviour. A married guy staying with his wife's parents will invite ridicule from others (including but not limited to the wife's relatives). If the child chooses his/own path, it is considered disobedience, not independence and thus it dishonours the family. May be she feels the need to socialize, have her neighbours over for her own mental health. Like it or not, many of us don't have the luxury of thinking about work/education - life balance, mental health etc. Chennai Managara Makkal Reddit Narpani Mandram -- சென்னை மாநகர மக்கள் Combined this with a series of failed and deeply unhappy marriages that I saw in my immediate family/friends circle while growing up, and the fact that children of these marriages (my cousins and friends) struggled with mental health issues throughout their childhood and teenage years, I think I had made up my mind not to marry nor have kids by hey, so I(f16) come from a family that doesn't believe in mental illness, and therapy or medication is considered taboo. 56 million. They never gave a single crap about my mental health, so I Our commute times are too long to prioritize fitness. My mental health rn and at 16 wasn't the best either due to factor of things. Jaise mai poori jawani aas me bita diya gaming computer It's because mental illness (and developmental issues) are heavily stigmatized in many Asian cultures. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, but they lack the flexibility or the interest to expand their horizons a bit. A lot of things go into finding a therapist and getting help. An adult who is mentally unstable, cannot cope with Teach them the concept of mental health via CBT, Psychotherapy, DBT, and Humanistic therapy and recover in the process. Concepts like “log kya Many parental factors always impact a child 's development, mental state and behaviour where one of them is the parents' mental health. Now All I Feel Is Guilt And Hesitation Need Some Advice Please EDIT 1/Update: I spoke to my parents after a few days, and my father said the only big hesitancy left for them is the age (i. tldr: Indian Parents Are Unhappy And Do Not Approve Of My Non-Indian Partner, But Will Reluctantly Allow Us To Marry. Mental health problem is a very loose term: covers everything from academic stress, adjustment problems to Yes. Because mental health and parents go together as well as ketchup and biryani. Their entire life is spent worrying, working and hoping for us. Indian parents tend to control all our actions and think we owe them. It’s like Indian parenting is often culturally acceptable child abuse. Finally yes, Indian parents, more often than not, are much more bothered about what their child appears to be in front of other people, than what's actually going on with them. Parents support their children as long as they're not able to earn. Also an Indian-American woman, now happily married to a non-Indian man. Mental health, blame parents. Parents do their best but most Indian parents had a minimum of 5 siblings and they were neglected, or brought up in an insensitive environment - think of it like a boot camp. THEY'RE NOT KICKED OUT OF THEIR HOMES. The Indian kids were under a lot more stress and held to higher expectations. I think it depends on how old your parents are. It's like a never-ending cycle of toxicity that I can't seem to escape. I am 18(M). Traditional beliefs and stigmas surrounding mental health persist in South Asian communities, contributing to delays in seeking help and treatment. Hey man. Men are not allowed to post or comment. I'd say you're more lucky than most Indian women in that aspect. these people expect us to be there slaves, retirement plan, source of happiness, ambition fulfillers? LIKE I COULD GO ON? it makes me so angry how every set of indian parents is just ingrained to think that children are property or a requirement for life which then leads some very mentally unstable people deciding to have children which just leads to more generational Frankly, "normal" is a whole spectrum. Or check it out in the app stores   (that are not discussed properly nor acknowledged because they don’t consider mental health important) of their own that they start to reflecting them on us My Indian parents did the same and even kind of restrained me (20m) from I(19f) am indian and i have strict parents . Therapy will help with unlearning, and loving yourself. While most Indian parents have a mentality of being depended on their kids I would say talk to them about it and tell them about your future plans and that you’ll always stand with them when they need help. /r/Parenting is the place to discuss the ins and out as well as ups and downs of child-rearing. I am topper of my class, but still all time whenever see me chilling, they got irritated and scold me to study. The average Indian male has to deal with toxic Indian work culture and somehow find the energy to parent. the nastier you get treated (even by parents). Poor people have more issues and more issues lead to bad mental health in my opinion Having no emotional connection with the family is the one reason we feel those personal emotional connections with movie stars and sports stars, making them earn 1000 crores, having a emotionally connected Indian parents is a unicorn 🦄, so we all suffer silently, and some with media, and some with alcohol, and others with Internet and phone The biggest problem with Indian parents is that they are not able to adapt their mind with the dynamically changing world. true. Agreed. and restricting will do wonders for the kids' mental growth. which I did for sometime but because of the job thing explained above I am back with them and my mental health has worsened over the past 6 months so I Our mental health is better- as well as our physical health but my parents have been deemed terrible even though they keep paying for all medicines, maids, therapy sessions, house maintenance, all bills and what not. Such generalizations are not accurate and have to be put in context. The average office goer Indian is too tired. I feel we could deal with it better when they where younger as opposed to now, when they're all adults. Mental torture is evil but we grew up thinking out more pressure on the kid. Or check it out in the app stores The mental health subreddit is the central forum to discuss, vent, support and share information about mental health, illness and wellness. In South Asian communities, the prevalence of mental health issues is often underreported due to cultural stigmas and the lack of awareness. And also, not all the parents are mentally healthy. You are ruining your mental health for someone who doesn't give a dime about it. To anyone who's ion the same predicament as me (or is in GCSEs and may be choosing subjects soon) **PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IGNORE WHAT YOUR PARENTS SAY ABOUT YOUR SUBJECT CHOICES. And that has caused so much mental stress that you have become a different person altogether. But the overconfidence to handle things on my own, (even when i cant event wash my chaddi properly) is what the problem is. But thanks to this pandemic that gave a whim to utter over the mental health issue. But drawing boundaries will not only help your mental health but also in the future when you marry someone, they will still need to keep to the boundaries. Nah stop generalizing Esp in asian/indian uni and colleges, avg score is a 1300-1450 And if the child gets past 1450 that is considered a pretty good high score I got a 1470 and yes my parents were really really happy abt that So, Depends upon your parents tho but 1550 is a good score and no comment shall make you feel as if you've done bad or smtg common. That’s the number of people suffering from depression in India, and another 38 million have anxiety disorders. I have no excuse/reason to leave tbh, I’ve graduated university, my work is 15min away from my parents house like what would they tell other people why I left? Just for my mental health I need to leave. I have The level of ignorance for indian parents for mental health is just depicted here so clearly. Or check it out in the app stores They think that mental health is a hoax that children invent to make excuses for not wanting to listen to the so-called reality about how they are so bad. My parents too have the stigma of Mental Health and they fail to realize it is an essential medicine to recover. Sometimes they have trust issues or other undetected mental disorders because fuck mental health am I right or what! Edit: In any case this is a extremely hard decision that your husband has to make. Being raised by a single parent who has a mental illness is a very hard thing to cope with. But then they just want to play safe and they play it safe. I mean I was almost going to get aborted. But if they do it for venting or for silly reasons it is not. Am I right to want to move out or should I be more understanding to my parents and stay with them for a couple more years? Any advice will be Therapy is excellent, no discrediting it, but personally, it didn't work for me. The controlling, codependent parenting style you describe (not intended as an insult - my parents are similar) is considered "traditional" or outdated But, supportive or "modern" parenting are seen by those who have this value system as "not caring", or " letting" children "do anything". Let me tell you sth, both my parents Make sure your friends are aware of your situation. My mum also stressed me about the debt so much and the fact that if my mental health took a turn again, I would be very tight for money-I decided against going. I’m actually seeing a therapist right now for my depression but I just gave them a fake reason that it’s “to help me do better in school”. Generally if parents smack you for something egregious it is okay. Especially my parents. From the early stages of pregnancy to when your teenagers are finally ready to leave the nest (even if they don't want to) we're here to help you through this crazy thing called parenting. Maybe try a local group therapy. He will have to face his parents and live with the consequences. write down to the finest of detail that come to your mind about that thing. It’s insane finding out how many people actually have issues. I m not saying all parents are like that, but many parents still don’t want to change their mind. Indian parents really really need their kids to get a degree, at least from the For 27 years I’ve experienced both but constant negative comments about my body, clothes, jewellery, career, aspirations, lifestyle to relationships by both parents, mainly from my conservative Indian mother with mental health issues. that she is too "old"). I met my now best friend, 8 years back and she has gone through some rough childhood. Would keep shouting even if I 'wasted' 5 minutes out of my schedule. We don’t prioritize mental and physical health. Mental health, as a Well, 80% of the Indian parents, wanted kids only to take part in the rat race. Her parents are highly educated and rich but have treated her like a burden. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. getting help from a professional is the best thing to do. I had (much like most asian kids) the same experience as yours. Or check it out in the app stores very late, they blame it all on parents because parents are easy targets in current Indian intellectual spectrum. And overall, I am performing very average in life. do not exist; they are all a manifestation of your bad mindset and an overexposure to Western stuff because of "using the damn phone too much" and because the medical community has I don't really like Indian parenting style cuz they are over involved and I feel like I am being watched all the time. Or check it out in the app stores the same extent to which Indian parents push their kids to succeed is why Indian Americans are among the most educated and successful groups in America. It also means you should educate them at all times about being healthy and being there for each other first. Mine are big time narcissists. It is a slow, slow process and some of these things feel like they are just a list of things and you can't do them all, but they are connected. Most Indian parents are the embodiment of Vishnu and Lakshmi. A parents job is to be the governing body, and mature individual who has objective coping skills and adjustment methods. [Advice needed on what to do] Serious What are my options, what can I do if my parents are fighting continuously ever other day. Tbh most of indian teens fell under the poor and middle class umbrella These families have alot of things to worry about, I myself didn't know the concept of mental health a year or two ago and thought depression was a just being sad. While social media does have a negative impact on mental health, it is nowhere near being the only cause for mental illness - and social media being a negative influence does not negate poor parenting from Indian parents. You know the usual rat race, my son is better than your son, his grades are better, he is a doctor, i got my daughter married, what's the issue with your daughter why haven't you gotten her married yet, like everything is a fucking competition. My parents are more focused towards studies & getting future job thing which i think is same with 95% indians parents. Parents treat children as their property and/or old-age security. Try talking to them or if you have a brother/sister who understands you ask him/her Indian parents are the worst at handling mental issues like depression, anxiety and even bipolar disorder. Always saying kuch padhai likhai karo. I think people (Americans) generally know this isn’t a good parenting style that leads to flourishing children and adults. I imagine that my parent's dismissal of my anxiety/depression may have been Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. I still have a built up resentment for my parents for restricting me in terms of pursuing my hobbies, making friends, women etc. There's not much research, and it's rarely talked about. Always think for yourself. I know they care, and that they'll come around, but the initial talking is the hardest part and they make it sting. Mental health is important, no doubt, but for lakhs of students in the country, their survival and career is more important. Moving out is the easiest way out of mental stress with parents. -unfit to be parents yet they keep on what a great job they have done by becoming toxic parents. it's damn hard. So I would research about it and possibly find some free resources in the mean time. Reach out to the administrators, counselors, mental health office at your college to let them know as well. I understand the stigma around mental health in Indian households, I’ve been battling my trauma for 10 years and my family doesn’t have a single clue about it because I was obviously afraid of how they’d react. I can't shake the feeling of being used just for venting and complaining. 28 votes, 28 comments. Ive only ever I don't blame parents for these things, but it's really damaged the way I look and treat my own mental health. Gen X (today's so called "indian parents") people did not knew about depression or anything or pressure of their parents to become "engineer or doctor" or societal peer A safe community to discuss and share both serious and silly content - for and about Indian women. No wonder why me and my sister have low self esteem Tl;dr - Parents excessively worry about their unmarried daughters. Indian parents are doing the exact It’s so dumb that they look down on things like getting mental health treatment. If you mean mental torture or hitting it is different. It’s difficult for Indian parents to let go of their mindset due to Being raised by immigrant parents shaped the conversations around mental health that we had as a family. Or check it out in the app stores Yeah, and if I’m being honest I feel most of the Indian parents do need therapy. Its funny, both of them have experienced mental health issues and have seen therapists, yet they are so dismissive of what I'm going through. ) (just to add, I would get loans for uni but due to my parent’s income. if you r not getting any conclusion from it n want to think more of it then Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. Many Indian parents with troubled childhood often Me and my wife did that. Reply reply pubgvicca84 You sound like a millennial parent, you people understand mental health and impact of bad environment on kids. So when they haven't received much, they also do not know how to give more. What i think is maximum indian gamers lied to their parents to buy a PC to play games rather than doing study stuff. Indian parenting is lazy and neglectful because Aur kar lo arrange marriage. It is seen as an excuse for not getting things done. I’m 23. Connect with fellow Indians and ask away!. In india Almost all generation before z are like this here in india our relatives compare us ,parents abuse us ,friends become competitive and no one can even talk about mental health here in india Mostly home environment is toxic parents fighting all the time ,seeing domestic violence , and then seeing hate in PPL a child s brain is already Bhai blackmailing to Indian parents ka brahmastra hai lekin yeh wala behaviour normal nahi hai, most probably vo tere liye zada possessive hai isiliye vo aesa kar rahe hai kyuki vo chahte hai ki tu acche marks se pass ho. Sorry you are having to go through this. Indian society and Indian parents have that judgemental streak, and they will judge almost everyone around. because mental health, and other factors are never put into consideration /s protein shakes are not considered natural as per our parents. It was taking a toll on my mental health. But a choice only he can make. Just leave your parents alone and help them only when necessary They always dismiss my mental health issues saying that I have all these issues because I have everything to my feet and don’t know the value of hard work. Instead, they think Lekin is chakkar me apni mental health na kho dena. God forbid if you have psychosis or something, then you're a literal outcast. And having an authority figure who can't make a good decisions about what you do or about if you can do something if you ask is very frustrating. We are alone now(no relationship with parents and siblings for both), but happy together. . one of my female cousins married her boyfriend after college. They were selfish and chose what they wanted me to do over what I wanted to do. They weren't happy when I moved out and it was difficult adjusting living alone (initially, now I'm married) but it was worth their initial anger to be happy now with life. Mental health struggles are seen as a character/behavioral flaw, rather than attributing it to genetic, environmental, situational factors. Rather, they believe in snooping, restrictions, and zero privacy, thinking delusionally that all this will make their kid a perfect innocent human being. You must softly but surely keep nudging her to start going out and doing something. It causes mental health, substance abuse Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. He knew he didn't want to have kids because he felt that he didn't want to live like that. I believe that the majority of these narcissistic Indian mothers do not have that, and in many ways are unfit to be mothers. Everyone. I've explored the spiritual, the scientific methods, and everything in between. A lot of my friends have mental health issues. My relationship with my parents greatly improved after that. Because it's invisible. Fulfilling their obligations as a parent; Indian society and culture demands that a parent’s responsibility lasts until their child is married, if you compare more western and individualistic cultures their responsibility ends when the child finishes minimum education (HS) and is considered a legal adult. My mom is an 80’s-90’s kid and she had (obviously not a super healthy, it was still 30-40 years ago) a healthier relationship with And hitting kids is part of Indian culture. I found a stark difference between the lives of kids with Indian and non-Indian parents. and it just I'm a mental health counselor, and I run a counselling service especially for Indian women. It is true on so many levels and so, moving out is the easiest way to go about it. the average Indian female has to fight nosy neigbours, piling housework and her ever demanding husband to make things work and raise this kid. The obedience of children is the honour of the father. climate change, shitty people all around, my own mental health, family history of mental and physical illnesses, my cats not being bothered by annoying, grabby hands, financial stability . I can very easily say no one cares about your issues. Even though it's the right thing to do I think most people in this country would pull the "well parents are parents na 🥺 respect culture values family" routine and choose the easy way out. I even said they need it coz I feel every indian parents have some control issues, etc. Building a healthy relationship with money is very important but you need to heal your relationship with it first Reply reply Ok-Bridge-1045 • I agree with this. I am not saying for one bit that you are wrong to feel the way you do, but try and see how your mom feels. You will never be better Somehow r/India keeps showing up in my Reddit feed and I have to say, as a Canadian of European descent 1. Work from home situation sucks for most of us. They were like we dont need it Being out of their control, getting healthy mentally and physically, reading and learning. They have been struggling with depressions and anxiety ever since they immigrated to the United States from India> I have seen them go through some unthinkable griefs, like not being able to see their parents for the last time or attend their parent's funeral because of archaic immigration laws. Indian society is a collective society, where each member has to sacrifice for the sake of others and you're supposed to silently endure difficulties, for the sake of others. I don't really like Indian parenting style cuz they are over involved and I feel like I am being watched all the time. Yet, it’s at the cost of a lot of Indian Americans self esteem and individuality honestly so glad ive decided to be cf because of so many reasons. I feel bad for pointing fingers but r/IndianTeenagers is a chill community for Indian teenagers and beyond to have fun, enjoy and relax. e. Due to the lack of mental health support, I wanted to provide a platform where people can genuinely crowdsource support, guidance, and answers to their mental health related questions - all via group messages (based on mental health topics, age, gender, etc. Now, she is scared of her parents, and she knows that she was beaten because she got less marks. The important thing is your husband stood by you. It’s not right and the amount of pressure you have/are going through is tragic to say the least. Talk to a friend, write a journal, talk to a therapist, talk to a stranger on reddit, do whatever but don't bottle up your feelings, it leads to worse mental health. You have to look after your own life Suggest moving out if its still an option Moving away doesnt mean loving them any lesser. If may mental health issue ka such as this one matic sa paniniwala ng iba na nababaliw kana. AASRA: 91-22-27546669 (24 hours) Sneha Foundation: 91-44-24640050 (24 hours) Vandrevala Foundation for Mental Health: 1860-2662-345 and 1800-2333-330 (24 hours) iCall: 9152987821 (Available from Monday to Saturday: 8:00am to 10:00pm) There's more to it. But others, who stepped out of the comfort zone of their parents house early, are doing better in these areas. They even don't allow me to meet my friends. For instance, there is no literal translation for depression, anxiety, or even mental health in my native language. Indian parents go overboard with academics of their child(ren) and make it the sole goals of their lives and their kid’s lives. I've had problems with my mental health for about 5 years now and never really had a serious conversation with anyone about it. Ik bohot fuck up hai yeh par samjh mei bhi kuch aese hi situation mei hu aur sach bolu to tu kuch kar bhi nahi paiga iska I am diagnosed with MDD (Major Depressive Disorder), it started with Dysthimia and grew into something else. Our hobbies if any aren’t as fitness based as others. (Source: past mistakes) A community where people can share their experiences of growing up with Asian parents, specifically, those who are strict, abusive, or have impossible expectations. There are many you can find online. If our parents haven't given us something it's only because they didn't have the means to because if they did, we would have gotten it without even asking. But I've always wanted to understand the mental health challenges of Indian men. There are two kinds of people: those who hear their thoughts and those who don’t, as I So, yea as a Indian who’s on her late teens, here’s an article which I’m writing about what’s actually wrong with the indian way of parenting. Keeping aside our parent's old school approach towards everything or their liberal approach (like in your case), it is a fact that Indian parents spend most of their life and resources in bringing up the kids. Obedience is of paramount importance in an Indian family. Also just letting your daughter work is nor progressive in 2022, maybe it was in 1980s Welcome to r/AskIndia, the ultimate Q&A hub for curious minds in India. See my earlier posts above for background on the recent decision by the Ramapo Indian Hills Board of Education to defund / terminate mental health services for 50 students in our school district. -Soaked in patriarchy, biased behaviour towards male and female child, making pikachu face when the male child does a complete 180 when all they have being doing is raising him to becoming an arrogant entitled assh*le his entire life. our family is also very enmeshed where I literally have nobody to talk to or spend time with except my parents since I cant go out of the house for any reason whatsoever . It's abusive Indian Parents. basically he sort of abandoned her, hardly visited her during the pregnancy, Geeta get less marks, her parents beat her, and "discipline" her into studying. Our Mental health really gets drained if one is not treated properly by any relationship. Our society has a lot of serious flaws. To all the parents, don't get pregnant if you're gonna make your kids feel like they're burden on you. Wᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ʀ/SGExᴀᴍs – the largest community on reddit discussing education and student life in Singapore! SGExams is also more than a subreddit - we're a registered nonprofit that organises initiatives supporting students' academics, career guidance, mental health and holistic development, such as webinars and mentorship programmes. I'm currently in YR11 and have mocks in a couple weeks and exams at the end of the school year, I want some kind of help since I'm scared it may only cause more problems for me later on in the year, when starting college and getting a job. -raising a hue Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. I'm not mentally able to cope with all these but I don't have any resources to go forward with therapy. I launched a mental health app in India called Oros Health. With many Asian cultures, mental health is a taboo topic, and people who suffer from it are seen more as belonging to an asylum than needing care and help. How has your parents parenting style affected you as an adult? (in a positive or a negative way) Western culture atleast respects your boundaries while Indian parents and adults DONT. I was fortunate to live next to public parks but not sure if that’s the case for everyone. it takes a toll on my mental health. And I know they never wanted to have girls. if you think you r overthinking try to write down your thoughts. I suspect I've been depressed since I was around 6 or 7. My mental health also improved. So is Indian parenting. Or check it out in the app stores Indian parents create monsters and leave women to deal with them hope you're doing good now . A lot of the Indian parents would come to talk to me at the end of the day wanting to review their kid's day. No choices for a kid kids are dumb. all of my friends go outside every weekend and I am locked in my room with so much frustration. Then, when everything was fine, she'd claim mental illness doesn't exist and if it does nobody in her family has it, and say she never said that. The reality of Indian parenting is suffocating me with anger, sadness, and hatred. Hard enough that I feel that most Asians in the community avoid discussion on a such a serious topic; but anytime me or my friends may mention our stress and issues with things such as depression, they would just dismiss or ignore it. Brown Parents, well for the lack of a better word are ignorant. What they don't understand is the more I don't really wanna tell my parents that I'm still struggling. I do not want to downplay anyone’s mental health, but saying that only Indian students abroad have them is inaccurate. 💔 One Board Member who voted against the program compared mental health treatments to I learned about AP classes, honors programs in colleges, etc. One of them is marrying two random people with similar socioeconomic backgrounds, expecting them to flourish together and when that doesn't happen, telling them that you don't give up in relationships, you sacrifice and shut up and put up with it for the family. ). Usually, ideal parents in India are found in reel life,not in real life. You My mother is an emotional, traumatized but ideal Indian woman from her generation, where she went through a lot in her childhood, was treated differently her whole life for being a girl, married off at a young age into another conservative family, I don't see it in India. maybe your parents raised you with just words, congratulations. Your parents will not go NC with you because you are their only child. once that is done get the conclusion of it and stop that topic then n there n decide not to think about it further. But it comes at cost of other things in life; social life, communication, community development, soft skills and many more. Read books about this subject. They do all this to see the kid live a happy life, and their own happiness depends on how happy the kid is. My fiance grew up like this. I am totally aware that I need to see a counselor to help me cope with my trauma and anger issues but it's a shame that mental health is not given priority in India and people like me have to resort to online platforms to find answers and solace. They have two children and behave exactly like they learned watching their parents. All of us have joined the work force in the past 2-3 years. Then after a gap the spouses parents visit for a few months. What you are feeling is real, but can be improved. This is a plac This is why Indian kids are under so much emotional and mental pressure. My social skills are mediocre. Reply reply Parents dont know that peer pressure, lack of freedom due to "over care" of children, lack of anything basic children needs, doesn't care about their social/mental health,etc. Sirf paise se khushi nahi milti, un paise kharch karne time agar enjoy karne ki kshamta hi kho doge, to paise kaam me nahi ayenge. Unlike others, I lack confidence. the more you get mentally well, the more well you want to get physically. Made me wonder if intellectual ability measured the worth of someone's life and if it did what about all the educated and successful Indians who hold such regressive thoughts. I am in my thirties and live with my parents for mental/physical health reasons and share many of I may not have Indian parents but I have heard that a lot of Indian parents or just strict parents/religious parents are like that. A study published in the Lancet Psychiatry Journal (2019) found that mental health disorders affect approximately 15-20% of the South Asian population. This is important because your parents may try to get you on a trip to visit relatives overseas and end up at a party that is your arranged wedding. Reply reply mrB1ueSky • Indian parents come from a generation that really had to struggle, and that has seen lots of economic struggles around them. If you need support or know someone who does, Please Reach Out to Your Nearest Mental Health Specialist. Share limited information. Doosri ki sunne mein, aur unko khush rakhne mein, apni mental health, emotional life, existence ka popat ho jaata hai, aur logo ko farq nahi padta. 23 votes, 14 comments. I'm underweight (50kg) and have chronic stomach related issues. (then health Losing Your Parents, Finding Yourself: The Defining Turning Point of Adult Life -Victoria Secunda When Madness Comes Home: Help and Hope for the Families of the Mentally Ill - Victoria Secunda Children of the Self Absorbed: A Grown-Up's Guide for Getting over Narcissistic Parents - Nina W. An abrupt spark of awareness for mental health. So, it’s another battle. Actually everyone should if they feel this way. Im from a south asian country but moved to Canada for my bachelors'. There has been verbal fights almost everyday now, with physical fights about every 1-2 weeks. I’m a science student and I’m taking coaching for JEE. The loan for food/rent would be the very minimum. I was in a much better tier 1 college before this and had an excellent peer group but a single depressive episode made me drop out, a decision that is haunting me even now. Old parents: ye mental health issue kuch nai hota Roz subah jldi uth k Hanuman chalisa pado sb theek hai What makes you think this has something to so with Indian parents? This happens in the west too, you just don't hear about it. not everyone can To say my parents are struggling with their mental health would be an understatement. This makes her think that "Shayad maine parents ko itna gussa dilaya, maybe I am a burden to her, cuz I didn't study". Wish you healing n good life ahead 🙌 hugs XXXXXX. I’m a social worker now, mainly working with Asian and Deaf families to accommodate their language needs. Want them to have a "life" Have a good day Reddit, I wanted to vent and highlight toxic parenting in Indian and other Asian countries because it creates sad and lonely people who do monstrous things, please don't. But I understand your dilemma, my parents try to control me at times and yet, I love them and can't leave them just like that. (And Im glad i made that choice. Indian mentality to question student's worth is so sick. With very little money and struggling mental health while living alone, I had to discover my own free or very cheap ways to cope. Heck we even send grandmother's food twice a day. Some people esp. ( my parents don't 'believe' in homosexuality either and I haven't told them I'm bi). And yeah it's a parent's duty to provide financially to the child AS LONG AS HE'S NOT AN ADULT. I noped out out of my parents house after I got a good career. Social media is bad. They'll have one set of parents visit then for a few months. When I told my parents I was moving For the mental health aspect of this post, until you're 18 you can't make an appointment with a therapist :/. I was in 11th and my parents kept record of every minute I spent after I reached home from allen. I. Or check it out in the app stores mental health is a very big problem in India, but there is little to no awareness about it. Does anyone have any explanations or personal stories? But this is no doubt mentally abusive if you looked at it in the context of any other culture. Indian families are patriarchal. Rant/Vent it wears me out mentally and that gets exhausting and feels like it adds onto my already burn out mental health. Whereas we take USA, since the structure itself puts emphasis on sports and gives sport based scholarship. This is not easy on your family either, the Covid brings out the worst stress-triggers in all of us. It will do a lot of good for your and your partner’s personal mental health. You deserve better and your happiness and mental health is valid and should be taken care of. I always have to break it down to my clients what mental health means (among other things). the guy became physically abusive soon after marriage and kept demanding my uncle to send him money. If you're struggling with mental health issues, how do you get Indian parents on board to help? We've got the guide for you. Parents do much much more sacrifices for their children than the children do in The lockdowns screwed me up mentally and few external factors made my mental health worse. Consider it strongly. An American co-worker asked me if it was true if Asian parents Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. It will be a scary situation for him. No matter what you do Indian parents are never going to be happy about you. It’s a great world for mental health issues. I wanted to work in a certain field after my graduation, they were always against me working under someone, although they let me try it, they were never happy about me trying that. my parents cant distinguished the difference between Insanity and Depression. However I don’t think they understand how toxic this all really is - and by that I mean the Asian parents. wamm yjlyy banlw pcekulk heknu omyy fziyl bkis xls jufjp